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April 30 Popularity as Judged by Number of Visits to My Blog Apparently, I am a hit. Or rather this blog is a hit. People are checking it pretty regularly using the link from my website. An analysis of the log file would tell me who, what, where and when, but it doesn't matter. I hope that they have found what they wanted. What would be nice is if they would leave a comment, be creative, leave a suggestion, be brave leave your mark on my blog. But people won't do that. Lately only one person has asked me about my side of a certain story, only one person was even interested in talking to me directly. That is the most disappointing thing of all. Every story has at least two sides. If you accept one side and listen to that side only then how do you know that you are getting the truth? So, in future blogs I may throw in a few buzz words that might catch some search engine. Something along the lines of "Troop 464 meets in Pearland, TEXAS." But I am not to be critical, or say anything that even might be perceived as critical, because it "might" affect some boy's experience. What if the situation actually changed for the better because someone had the courage to speak out? Then a boy's experience might be improved, now that is an interesting thought. April 29 Swine FluA buzz is in the air, hand sanitizer is being sold by the five gallon bucketful. People are afraid to touch anyone else, or even items that someone may have recently touched. AND let's talk about the Mexican-American border, because keeping legal people from entering the United State will surely protect us from this virus (I hope you read this with the irony I was intending). Now every government entity, school and business is sending out email instructions on how to handle suspected cases of swine flu, and coming up with plans in case it does become a pandemic infection. "Common sense is uncommon," we see it every day. If everyone followed a common sense approach to contact with other people any virus would find it harder to get a foothold. Any virus spread by repiratory droplets needs contact with your mucosal tissues to infect you. So... WASH your hands! I am not talking about a dousing with handsanitizer, instead really wash your hands with soap and water with actual scrubbing while singing the Alphabet Song or Happy Birthday twice without rushing. Killing 99.9% of anything is not a good enough goal, if you emulsify and get rid of dirt and germs you will be better off. April 24 Friends, Friendship and CoffeeTo my dear friends.... When we first started meeting for coffee / breakfast, I didn't realize how dependent I would become on our hour to an hour and a half meeting of minds! These weekly meetings make all the difference in the world to my outlook on life. The things that we share more often than not remind me that I am not going crazy. Especially when we compare the stages our teens are going through and discuss wonderful subjects like the "change." Learning from you and with you is a terrific experience. You really help ground me and keep me sane! Let's consider adding a level of complexity to our meetings and read a new book every month or so. It would be great to share ideas and analyze author's intentions with you. I am looking forward to next week so please remind me...where are we going to meet again????? Professions and Integrity“It's not what we eat but what we digest that makes us strong; not what we gain but what we save that makes us rich; not what we read but what we remember that makes us learned; and not what we profess but what we practice that gives us integrity.” --Francis Bacon, Sr. So, the
title is a little misleading. Another great quote that my husband sent to
me. I wasn't going to repost this entry but he urged me to, so I am with a little editing. Not because I think I will anger someone, or because I was not vague enough. Just because I want to make it better. Of late we have been having discussions about freedom of speech and
integrity. Apparently, if something I say hits close to home and angers
someone else then I have been critical and that is wrong. I should not
even allude to an event or disagreement about how something was done in a blog
or other electronic posting. A difference of opinion may not be
criticism. You (a generic term used to describe ANYONE) think it was
right to do A,B and C. I think you (again a generic ANYONE) should have
done B, C and D. If I let you know that is what I think then is that
being critical? If you are already predisposed to be sensitive to anything
I say then the answer is yes. In the end it isn't what we say, it is what
we do (practice) that gives us integrity, is what people should judge us by. If we
say we are honorable but haven't acted with honor then we do not have
integrity. Letting go of anger and acting with integrity is important, it
makes your life less stressful. AND forgiveness is a bedrock of Christian
beliefs. Forgiving someone else is one of the most difficult things to
do. Forgiving yourself is often even harder. In the end the ability
to forgive also shows integrity, because your actions do speak louder than the words you say or write.
April 22 To BLOG or Not Blog Could be I am writing to you, or to me, or to no one in particular. But if it is helping me adjust and be at peace with me, then does it really matter? If it hurts someone that I care about then I guess it should. I need to think more carefully about what exactly I am posting. Sharing with the world only those things that are innocuous and non-threatening. Last night, I rashly said I was going to stop blogging. I will have to think about it. It has become a lifeline, a calming force. It helps me to organize my thoughts. If something I write bothers, incites, influences, dismays YOU (this is the generic You, not anyone in particular) then maybe I am better with words than I thought. But if I really hurt you that was not my goal. I thought I had gotten rid of yesterday's posting, but lo and behold it was in my clip board. I am thinking about re-posting it, but I don't want it to upset anyone. April 20 Earth Day Footprints Thinking about footprints again on Earth Day April 20, 2009! I know most people think I am some whacko liberal. Really I am a mix of conservative and liberal views just sit and have a conversation with me. What you might find out is that I think about all kinds of things and that I am not so far away from your perspective on some issues. I am trying hard to look at people with more compassion, to be more empathetic. Perhaps if I am trying to see things from your point of view I will be a little more sensitive and not anger or hurt you. If we all approached how we interact with people and our planet with this same view I think that we would be in better shape. As we knock down more trees, create more trash all in the name of progress I hope we can pause for a moment and say a quick prayer for the earth. Leaving things in God's hands is fine especially when we don't have control of those things, but caring for the earth is something we can control, but will we? If God gave us the tools and knowledge to be good stewards of his creation (Earth) then I think it is our duty to do our best and take care of it, leaving as little a footprint as possible! April 19 Friend or Unfriend? One consequence of social networking is the friend requests from family members (including those who you acquire by marriage). This can be a very STICKY situation. Family members are related to you through no fault of your own. Some of them may actually be in your circle friends, in fact some of my relatives are people that I like, I respect their opinions (even if they differ from mine at times), and I want to stay connected to them. Then there is the other side of the fence. A family member who does not respect my opinion, you know the one who is always right, who knows that they are smarter than you, usually it is the family member with a BIG self-esteem issue. These people never consider that you might have given a lot of thought to an issue, that you may have actually looked at all sides and considered all of the evidence, maybe even back to the original source. If I thought for a moment that they were open minded, and may be it is a little arrogant for me to think that THEY did not consider ALL the evidence, their words give them away. They speak or write with the rhetoric they have heard in some corner or on talk radio, they accept what others have digested for them as the the truth without going out and looking for themselves. I have found that it is easy to be afraid of something if I remain ignorant about a subject. BUT if that is the case then EDUCATE yourself and get to know the facts from the original sources not from some drivel that someone cobbled together with their own biases glued to it! Wow! Sorry, that turned into a tirade. Here is where I need some input from others. The crux of the matter is... do you ignore a friend request from a family member? Or worse yet after allowing them onto your friend list do you block them, do you take the step to un-friend them? I don't know the answer, and the myriad of problems such actions would cause have made me pause before hitting the button. What would you do, or have you done in these situations? Leave me a comment and let me know! Control and Prayer Tim Liston's message tonight (www.newhopechurch.tv)spoke to me in a way that is very inspiring... He talked about control, leaving things in God's hands and being content with what we have (aren't we all expecting a government bailout soon!). There are three types of situations: 1. things that we have control of and we do control them (e.g. I am hungry, so I eat) 2. things that we have control of and we do not control them (e.g. credit card debt) 3. things that we do not have control of.... these are the things that we should prayer about and turn over into God's hands. So, I have given some things over to God, I am sure that he can handle them and will let me know what to do. April 17 Followup on Scout Oath and Scout Law According to the Boy Scouts of America Youth Protection Training Test.... ALL members of the BSA (adults and youth) are EXPECTED to conduct themselves with the principles of the Scout Oath and Scout Law... Boy Scouts of America Youth Protection Guidelines Notes on Discipline #5 Just completed doing the refresher for YPT. BSA does have a policy that requires logical consequences for discipline issues. Now isn't this interesting.... Boy Scouts of America Youth Protection Guidelines Notes on Discipline #5 Consequences: timeouts work for Cub Scout -aged boys. For Webleos Scouts and Boy Scout - aged boys allowing them to experience logical consequences of their actions is valuable and supports the ideals of scouting. If a privilege, activity, materials and equipment, or another person is disrespected in any way, a logical consequence needs to be applied. Freedom of Speech and Freedom to not Read What a coincidence, posted my last posting just moments before my husband called to say he had a text message asking us to attend a meeting because I have been accused of being too critical in my blogs. Well, let's put this into perspective. Hmmmmmm....I have the Constitutional Right of Freedom of Speech (so do you), anyone who chooses to read what I write has the freedom to choose whether or not they are going to read what I post. I am not hypersensitive, I am not adverse to receiving criticism, in fact, criticism helps people grow (if you look at each criticism, evaluate the criticism and look at some of them as opportunities for improvement). Let me know what you like, what you don't like about what I write. Some of it is venting, when people are not considerate enough to respond to situations then I sometimes vent about it in a blog. I try hard to not point the finger at anyone in particular, I will be even more diligent in the future. As I said in a blog a few days ago, I DO want to stop angering people, I DO NOT want the power to disturb and irritate anyone to the point of making them angry. So, read if you must, lose the link to this blog if anything disturbs you. I have the right to write what I want, you can close this window and not read it if you do not want to know what is on my mind! April 16 Who are you talking to anyways? A dear friend asked me this question about my blog postings one day after reading one of them. She wanted to know to whom I was directing my postings, and why would I want to be so frank about my feelings and emotions. To be perfectly honest they are really for me and me alone. These postings are not directed towards anyone in particular, in fact most of them are directed at me and what I perceive to be my short comings! They are my catharsis. It is my hope that others can relate or understand, and even have some empathy for me. Perhaps something I write might make another person feel better about a similar situation that they have gone through. The few comments that are posted here and there really do make a difference. Thanks to you who take the time to comment. I hope that anyone reading my postings comes away thinking about things a little different. If they provoke some kind of emotional response from you please let me know that too. I can take the good and bad, so please let me know what you think! April 15 Instead of Teasing and Bullying Let's live by the Scout LawTeasing is light hearted, it is not malicious and it is not meant to hurt someone else. It may inadvertently hurt someone because of the way that they perceive it, but teasing is different from bullying. Bullying is much more insidious, the bully derives a different sort of pleasure from the kind of comments and derisive remarks that they might say. They are definitely not teasing, not laughing with the "victim." Bullying takes teasing too far, it crosses the line. Most adults do not know where that line is, so how can we expect our children to know?
Children learn a lot from dealing with teasing, but they also learn a lot from friendliness, kindness and courtesy. These are all points of the Boy Scout Law. Everyone has differences from others that can be pointed out, it is how we treat people despite these differences that tells others what kind of a person we are. We need to teach the children to take to heart the Scout Law, it should be emphasized every time they recite it, that it is a code that they should live by and it should guide their thoughts and actions. Scout leaders and Parents of scouts could really help out by setting the example. When they recite the Scout Law and repeat the Scout Oath they should say it with conviction and then LIVE it! Here is one recipe:
At the beginning of the day recite the OATH...
Then recite the Scout Lawa scout is...
At the end of the day go through each point of the law again and think did I obey the Scout Law, did I do my best? It could have a long lasting positive impact on your life. April 14 You make me so very ANGRY!John F. Groom of Positive Press sends out some great quotes of the day. My husband shares these quotes for me when he thinks that they may spark a new blog entry from my brain to the keyboard and out to the blog sphere. I feel better having written this, hopefully it will have a good effect on you the reader too. After reading this quote I was brought back to the subject of bullying. The person who is doing the mastering is a bully. I have in the past several months been quick to be angry with several people who were once friends. At times I have been unable to get beyond this anger. This quote hit home! I have been allowing myself to be controlled by other people. By letting the little things that they do either directly or passively (one is very passive aggressive) bother me at any level I have been mastered, I have been bullied. I stopped doing some things that I enjoy doing because I was so angry. What a waste of time and energy, and I set a very bad example for my child who was being bullied by other children! A new leaf for me, a new outlook, I will work hard to not anger other people, so that I am not the disturber, and at the same time I will not allow myself to be bullied. I will try to be the person who puts their foot down and says enough is enough. If you are my friend then please send your good thoughts my way, because I need your support to make this happen. April 13 Relief from Bullying .... NOT yetDo 11 or 12 year old males benefit from Roses and Thorns sessions? Do they really hear the pain and anguish they have caused others? Are they capable of empathy? I think not. In fact, most adults are not capable of putting aside their own feelings and emotions in order to feel empathy for the next person, so how can it be expected of a young boy? In a previous blog I provided links to websites with videos and information on bullying, with information that actually helps with bullying. Education is the key to solving a lot of issues, if you learn enough, you can help others. When there are no real consequences for those who bully and those who participate by not stepping in and stopping the bullying (these are the passive bullies) the child who is bullied feels victimized by the adults too. In one particular case a child was moved to another group of boys, and the original group had no consequences. The main bully then proceeded to tell the new group how they should interact with the child. He obviously learned his lesson about bullying. He learned that he could continue, that adults would not impose any real consequences, that if he acted contrite then he could side step any true punishment. How long will this cycle continue? Anyone who is different can become a victim of bullying. Instead of embracing diversity, the closed-minded among us will reach out and bully someone who is different. Diversity comes in many forms. Bullying does too... My hope is that the adults would be capable of empathy and do the right thing. April 06 Broccoli and BergerMy husband and I are fans of Eric Berger, the Houston Chronicle Science Guy. Today his posting was about the benefits of broccoli. I am a broccoli fan, apparently I need to be a broccoli sprout fan! In the past three years, I have become a raw vegetable fan. My favorite salad is now more chopped veggies than leafy greens! Zucchini, carrots, bell peppers, green onions, mushrooms, broccoli, fresh pear, slivered almonds, dried apricots, cucumbers, alfalfa sprouts and sometimes fresh mango all find their way into my salad. I wonder if broccoli sprouts are going to be more common place with the publication of these latest findings? I guess until they show up on my grocers shelf, I can order broccoli seeds and sprout them myself! April 02 Friendly, Courteous, KindStarted a blog posting yesterday, but didn't really have the tone that I wanted it to have. After I read a comment by a dear friend, yes Beverly I mean you and yes we should get together, I had to rethink being even a little negative. I need to focus on the positive and be friendly, courteous and kind. I think that in the end that people will notice, or at the very least they will not see anything negatives to remember me by. In the past few months I have been introduced to the term snarky. Woman are often the snarkiest, men can be snarky also. For the most part those that are snarky think that they are being witty, that their sarcasm is being perceived as a witticism. Instead it often comes across as demeaning and as a put down. So, we are back to the golden rule… Live by the golden rule and be friendly (doesn't imply you have to be friends), courteous and kind. When I am being snarky please point it out to me. My path to being a better person is one step at a time, one foot in front of the other. Join me on this quest! Adjective snarky (comparative snarkier, superlative snarkiest)
This from google answers really makes an impact…
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